16 Nov 2006

Know Your Hymns

Author: Bobby Valentine | Filed under: Bobby's World, Humor, Personal

Know Your Hymns

Dentist’s Hymn . . . . . . . . . . . . . Crown Him with Many Crowns

Weatherman’s Hymn . . . . . . . . There Shall Be Showers of Blessings

Contractor’s Hymn . . . . . . . . . . The Church’s One Foundation

The Tailor’s Hymn . . . . . . . . . . .Holy, Holy, Holy

The Golfer’s Hymn . . . . . . . . . . There’s a Green Hill Far Away

The Politician’s Hymn . . . . . . . .Standing on the Promises

Optometrist’s Hymn . . . . . . . . . Open My Eyes That I Might See

IRS Agent’s Hymn . . . . . . . . . . . I Surrender All

The Gossip’s Hymn . . . . . . . . . . Pass It On

Electrician’s Hymn . . . . . . . . . . .Send the Light

Shopper’s Hymn . . . . . . . . . . . . Sweet Bye and Bye

Realtor’s Hymn . . . . . . . . . . . . . I’ve Got a Mansion

Massage Therapist’s Hymn . . . . . . He Touched Me

Doctor’s Hymn . . . . . . . . . . . . . . The Great Physician

For those who like to surpass the speed limit:

~ 45 mph . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . God Will Take Care of You

~ 65 mph . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Near My God to Thee

~ 85 mph . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . This World is Not My Home

~ 95 mph . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Lord, I’m Coming Home

~ 100 mph . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Precious Memories

Lord, give me a sense of humor,
Give me the grace to see a joke,
To get some humor out of life,
And pass it on to other folk.

Blessings,
Bobby Valentine

This entry was posted on Thursday, November 16th, 2006 at 7:54 pm and is filed under Bobby's World, Humor, Personal. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

18 Responses to “Know Your Hymns”

  1. John Says:
    November 16th, 2006 at 8:34 pm    Reply

    How very cool!

  2. Anonymous Says:
    November 16th, 2006 at 9:15 pm    Reply

    Great job. We have to learn to laugh with and at ourselves sometimes. Some many of us just lack that quality.

    Rev. T.J.Jackson

    http://www.Revtjjackson.wordpress.com

  3. Tim Archer Says:
    November 16th, 2006 at 9:49 pm    Reply

    Love them!

    The first joke I ever made up was:

    Q: “What’s the baker’s favorite hymn?”
    A: “I Knead Thee Every Hour”

    Hey, give me a break; I was about 5 at the time.

    —Tim

  4. Velcro Says:
    November 16th, 2006 at 11:13 pm    Reply

    Great stuff. It’s good to have a humorous post everyonce in a while.

    I just use humorous profile pics.

    Take care.

  5. Mark Says:
    November 16th, 2006 at 11:16 pm    Reply

    These are really good! I hope all is well for you up there.

  6. MommyHAM Says:
    November 16th, 2006 at 11:30 pm    Reply

    *giggle*

    Did you do these on your own or were they e-mailed to you? Either way, they are GREAT 😀

  7. Judy Nowlin Says:
    November 17th, 2006 at 12:44 am    Reply

    You are just too funny, Bobby! Really needed this touch of humor today, and thanks for providing it!

  8. DJG Says:
    November 17th, 2006 at 12:48 am    Reply

    OK, I am trying to think of one for the Mortgage Lender that I am….but these are all good.

    maybe….I know the Lord Will Make A Way for Me…..

  9. Vonnie Says:
    November 17th, 2006 at 1:50 am    Reply

    Those were good. Not “too scholarly”.

  10. Darin L. Hamm Says:
    November 17th, 2006 at 3:02 am    Reply

    That was pretty good.

  11. Alan Says:
    November 17th, 2006 at 3:42 am    Reply

    Blogger’s hymns:

    I Love to Tell the Story
    Wonderful Words of Life

    And when writers’ block strikes:

    Silent Night

  12. Danny Says:
    November 17th, 2006 at 4:31 am    Reply

    Funny stuff Bobby!

  13. Tim Archer Says:
    November 17th, 2006 at 3:12 pm    Reply

    For Donna:

    I’ve Got a Mansion Just Over the Hilltop

    I Owed A Debt I Could Not Pay

    Jesus Paid it All

  14. Blogging by Tina Says:
    November 17th, 2006 at 4:25 pm    Reply

    Can you think of a good one for a librarian or a court reporter?

  15. Velcro Says:
    November 17th, 2006 at 5:37 pm    Reply

    What about “I Saw One A Hanging On A Tree” for the KKK?

    Ummm… I thinked I stepped over that line.

  16. cwinwc Says:
    November 17th, 2006 at 6:39 pm    Reply

    How about “Minister’s Hymn just before Elders’ Meeting:

    “Troublesome Times Are Here.”

  17. Tony Arnold Says:
    November 20th, 2006 at 6:27 pm    Reply

    Great Bobby. I love them.

  18. brian Says:
    November 21st, 2006 at 5:46 pm    Reply

    then you have the misunderstood hymns

    “Bringing in the Sheets” which, of course, refers to doing laundry

    “Andy walks with me, Andy talks with me” not sure who andy is

    “Are you sowing the seed of the King’s Dumb Brother? I didn’t even know the king had a brother

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